Mommy Monday..oh I mean Mommy Tuesday

Andrea Siebert is yet another inspirational Mommy who I had the pleasure of meeting during our time in AZ. She is married to Jake (whom she made change his last name before tying the knot..it was Dykes) and together they have two sons Eric and Shawn.
Andrea’s Mommy journey is amazing!! I’m so glad she’s agreed to share her story with us. (and she happens to bear a uncanny resemblance to my sister Johnna..which kinda freaks me out a little)

Hey lady how are you??
I am great, looking forward to summer break with the kids.

So if I remember correctly, the first time I met you, your son Eric was in a wheelchair ….
Yes, Eric was diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis (RA) and in less than a year he was in a wheelchair.

So what exactly is Rheumatoid Arthritis?
It is an autoimmune disorder that causes the immune system to attack the joints, where it causes inflammation and destruction of the joints, cartilage and the tissues around the joints.

How did you feel when the Doctors told you Eric would never walk again?
I was angry, scared, and really sad. But I didn’t believe it. The Rheumatologist said if I didn’t put Eric on the drugs he recommended that Eric would never walk again, and that it would be my fault. He even threatened to call CPS if I didn’t put Eric on the drugs. I really felt in my heart that God was leading me away from Western medicine .

Tell me what lead you to the decision to go total opposite of the Doctors orders?
I can’t even tell you why I started exploring natural health, I mean I grew up drinking diet coke, eating frozen pizzas, and the veggies I sometimes ate came from a can. This was a completely new way of life for me. I believe that God was preparing me to fight this battle with Eric. If I didn’t have the passion and the belief that what we were doing was right, I would have listened to the doctors. They were not easy on us. I learned that the body is built to repair itself, we just need to get it functioning properly again. So I figured that is what we needed Eric to do.

Did people think you were stark raving mad?
Yes, they did. But mostly they were worried about Eric, and wondering if I really knew what I was doing. Eric was in a lot of pain and the disease was spreading throughout his body fast.

Tell me how Eric is doing today?
He is doing very well. He has been out of his wheelchair for a year and 3 months. His inflammation has been reduced by more then half. He is able to attend public school again, swim, and ride his bike. His teachers said they would have never known anything was wrong if I hadn’t told them.

You are one of the most passionate advocates for healthy eating and healthy lifestyle I know!! (don’t EVER drink a diet soda around Andrea!!) Tell me about Eric’s Doctor and what you are doing there currently.
Dr. Brett Brimhall is awesome! He is a Holistic Chiropractor and practices total body wellness. Eric is currently getting chiropractic, laser treatments, foot detox baths, magnacharger, and other therapies there. He also does Life coaching so that he can work through his emotions with out it affecting him physically. They also have a large area for natural supplements. I was offered a job at the clinic and started working there in March teaching there nutrition program to patients. It is so much fun, and I am learning so many new things. A true blessing for sure.

Ok now for the fun question…if you could pick just one famous person to sit and have coffee with who would it be??
It would be Sara Snow. So she could teach me all she knows about living from the earth, being green, and how she balances everything. I get excited just thinking about it, I want to learn all I can about natural living.

Andrea also LOVES to share her knowledge!! Please let me know if you would like more info on RA or Andrea's lifestyle change.

Remember

(Mommy Monday will be Mommy Tuesday this week)

The List..

This is the first time Shad has had to deal with the paparazzi:)
Loving my new lens..

10. I know this might sound crazy but..
I'm conducting an unofficial mustache survey.
I'm checking every women's stache out I meet.
I hope they don't notice.
My light blonde mustache is starting to become a tad bushy..but it is still light blonde. I'm just so worried I'm going to be that lady that does not realize she has a full on cop mustache going on..hmm what's a girl to do!
Do I start waxing and have it turn black eventually or do I hold out and just stay with the peach fuzz..Help!!

9. On the subject of personal grooming..As you might know I'm saving my pennies for Paris, so I've opted out of visits to my hair dresser. I'm just going to tell you right now, I miss it..I DON'T like Amber with longish hair and I can't WAIT to get it chopped off next week. Yes I have vanity issues..no I'm not afraid to admit it.

8. Got to meet Timi, it was fun! It's the first time I've ever met with someone just through blogging, how cool is that?? She is planning a huge blog party in August..
all the cool kids will be there..how bout you??

7. Had my first paid photog shoot a few weeks ago, pretty stoked about that:)

6. We extended our lease by two months this week. Let's see if we will have any more direction by the end of those two months..at this point I kinda doubt it..I guess thats just the way we roll.

5. I'm just sooo ready for the school year to be over. I'm soo over this year..this transition..public education in general..over it!

4. Got a new lens for Mothers Day..it's pretty sweet.

3. I keep forgetting to tell you this story..ever since I began planning my Paris trip, I've had one of these on my wish list..

Every time I hit Barnes & Noble I would gaze longingly at this very Amberish type journal..but never did take the plunge..Then one happy day as I was quietly baking a pie (really) I received a phone call from this sweet girl,

"Can I stop by, I have something for you?"

"Sure, do you want lunch?"

"No I'm going to WinCo." (cuz shes thrifty like that)

"Ok, I'm just here baking a pie."

Next thing I know..ding dong Wendy is here and she has this very special present for moi!! Did I totally overreact!! Yes!! I hugged her like 8 times! How did she know that I have wanted one for so long..she did not!! But she just knows me so well that she saw it and knew that it must be mine..Some days I just pinch myself..I have the best gf's EVER!

2. If you would like to check out some pic's of this spring's swappy goodness go here, here , here, and here. Fun stuff ladies!!

1. PARIS.PARIS.PARIS.PARIS!!!!! Let the countdown begin!!

Chip off the block (!!!!)

Mere mortals with untrained eyes might look at this picture and wonder..
Let me decode the message for you..

ABr! is set

Is really..

Amber! is sweet, in Silas language.

My very special youngest boy has taken up writing. Who knew Silas was a literary genius! Every night before bed instead of reading he wants to write, so we let him write all on his own..just for the sake of writing.

BUT I have a confession to make, my favorite part of this letter is the !.. you know the exclamation point.

ABr!

I'm such a SUCKER for a good exclamation point!!!
How many times has Zach said,
"Umm Amber..calm down with the exclamation marks on your blog."
Alot. (!!)

I mean it's just about the most perfect punctuation mark EVER! Does a period invoke such jubilation? I think not! Questions get old after a while, commas really make me crazy (thats why I do this...instead)
An exclamation mark is like a birthday party for words.

Pretty soon Silas will be writing stories that have multiple exclamation points!! One day when he is published, he will receive a letter from his editor asking him to calm down with the exclamation points.
It just might be too much for me to bear.

Almost everything in life comes back to an episode of Seinfeld..this time is no different..

Mommy Monday

This weeks Mommy Monday will look a little different than the last few. When I first had this idea I knew that I wanted to spotlight Mom’s of all different stages, types and phases of Mommyness. This next Mom popped into my noggin for a perfect choice. She is not someone I’m super close with, but I knew her journey would inspire and uplift, so I sent off an email asking her to participate in Mommy Monday, specifically to talk about her adoption story, my email ended like this…

Please don't feel at all pressured to do this. You just popped into my mind when I was thinking of all the Mommies I know and all of our different life journeys. If you are not comfortable please say no, I will not be at all offended, I promise:)
Thank You, Amber

To which she responded with this..

Hi Amber –
This sounds fun - you can count me in. Thanks for thinking of me.

Then about a week later I received this.

Hi Amber -
I am having trouble completing this project right now.....I'm going through a very rough time in my "mommy adventure". *****, my 12 year old, is having a hard time and it's really taking it out of me. I don't want to give the impression that I don't love being a mom and feel SO blessed to have these amazing girls for my daughters, but at the moment I can't seem to pull off the interview. I think one of the main things that's going on with her is adoption related. She has no contact with her birth mom and even though she doesn't express it to me in words, I know she's hurting. Her sister has ongoing contact(with her birth mom) and I think that really shines a light on what she feels she's missing. So your interview questions about open adoption are coming at a time when we are having issues. I know we'll get through this and one day I will have a great report of God's grace during this time. Even though we had an open adoption at the beginning, it hasn't remained open (birth mom's choice). This is probably more information than you really needed, but I wanted to try and explain why I'm struggling. I know you will understand - you're just that kind of person! I appreciate you thinking of me; thanks so much. And I'm sorry to let you down after I told you I would do it.

To which I responded..

I'm so sorry!! Please do not worry one tiny bit. Just even this email, even though you more than likely don't think so was an inspiration to me. Oh this journey we are all on! It may have different faces, but in our Mommy hearts it all stings the same way. This has me thinking.. would you mind me posting this email (if I left out all names and particulars) instead?? The transparency and love you just conveyed to me is really what being a mom is all about right?? No pressure at all. You let me know:)
I will be be praying for **** and the rest of your family.
Blessings-Amber

I’ve had that day (month?year?). If you have more than one child over the age of 2 you know precisely what I'm referring to. Because of this type of day..I’ve cried in public restrooms, churches, cars, friends house ect..
The thing is, it took me a long time to realize that I was not alone. I was not the only Mommy who had ever gone through this, and that my child was not the first to do that and will not be the last. It took me too long to ask for help. I wish that someone would have come along side me and said, "it’s ok, I understand, your not alone.”
This week, challenge yourself dear reader, find that Mom, you know the one (you might know two)..she is a little frazzled, a little stressed, you can see it on her face. Tell her a funny story about your life, buy her a coffee and let her know she is not alone.

Last week I had a comment from a reader that sums this up perfectly for me,
“With each story, although different from my own and one another, I feel a sense of connection because this 'mom-thing' gives us a commonality!”

Yes this journey is hard and no last I checked, kids don't come with a manual. While I can't give advice on adopted children, she cannot give advice on rearing twin boys..but we both found common ground.. as Mommies.

Mommy Monday

Jessica Williams is just about the hippest Mommy I know:) Her and her uber cool rocker hubby Jason live in Gilbert AZ. They welcomed their first child Cruz Elton into the world this past November 16th. I wanted to interview Jess because I’m pretty sure I’ve forgotten what my life was like before children, but it must still be fresh in her mind...

Family Portrait done by Whitney Darling

Jess!! We miss you guys soo much!! How have you all been?
Thanks so much for interviewing me Amber! We miss you guys more than you know. We have just been doing great. As you know, life with a baby is a ton of work so it has been a big adjustment. Cruz is just about the coolest little guy I know so it’s obviously all worth it!

You were married pretty young right? How long were you married before you started talking baby, and what made you decide it was time?
Yes, we will be married 6 years this coming September. I was 21 and Jason was almost 24 when we got married. We had always talked about waiting 4 years before having kids if we could help it. We really wanted to have at least that much time together as a couple before we started a family. At about 3 years, I felt like I was ready and we started talking about it more. Jason didn’t feel completely up for it, so we waited longer. Buy the time Cruz was born we had been married 5 years. It was well worth the wait too!

At any point during your pregnancy were you like..Oh CRAP!! What have we done?? I want my old life..I’m totally freaked out right now!!
Of course! I would feel like that off and on- especially because I had a lot of people around me that were telling me that our lives were going to drastically change and that it was going to be so hard. I remember thinking that I selfishly didn’t want to really give up my sleep like I knew I’d have to! And it was just fear of the unknown too. Being responsible for a little life is actually a huge deal and that didn’t hit home until we found out that we were having a boy. Around that time was when I remember thinking ‘oh my gosh- we have to actually raise this baby to function in society’. It was a scary thought especially since I had never done any of this before and there is no manual on how to raise kids! But most of the time I was just ecstatic to be a mommy- it’s something I’ve dreamed about my entire life!

Joking aside, you and Jason are two very cool people. You both are super popular:) and CRAZY busy. So now what?? Has your whole life come to a stop?? Or are you taking Cruz along for the ride??
Well, life IS harder with a baby- everyone was right. But our lives absolutely didn’t stop. We take Cruz everywhere when we can. (check this out) It just takes a lot of extra planning and we have a lot of great friends who love to baby sit for us when we need it. Certain aspects have slowed down for us, but it’s really changed in a good way. I hope and pray that Cruz will be a well-adjusted little kid because we take him to experience life with us!

Tell me about your decision to stay at home with Cruz? Was that a hard decision? Why?
It was a really hard decision that I still struggle with everyday. It wasn’t my plan to stay home at all. I always knew I wanted to be a stay at home mom- but once we could afford it. (That would not be now lol!) But there were several things that happened within my job that were beyond my control and made it apparent to us that God was clearly telling us that I was to be home with Cruz. I try not to feel guilty over not bringing in the paycheck I used to, but at the same time I wouldn’t change anything about the situation we are in. God has been so faithful to provide much more than we need. He has never failed us in this and I really feel it’s because we are trying to do the right thing for our family with me staying home with him. It’s really hard. I honestly miss being in an office sometimes. But then I heard Cruz laugh for the first time and knew that I wouldn’t trade being with him for anything. No amount of money will ever compare to this time I get to spend with him- and God has made that possible for me. It’s a huge blessing and the hardest thing I have ever done.

With only 5 words, describe your adjustment to Mommyness.
Sleeping as much as possible.

Ok here is a super deep question. You’re one hip momma! I’m pretty sure I will not be seeing you in sweats and curlers anytime soon:) What are your style secrets? Has it been hard to adjust to ‘mommy style’?
Haha! Thanks Amber, you’re sweet! I will credit my own mom for this one… I remember being a little girl and her teaching me the importance of keeping yourself stylish and looking your best. She always (and still is) extremely put together and takes wonderful care of herself. It’s a value of mine to make sure that I look my best for Jason. Letting myself go isn’t something that’s going to benefit him, our marriage or me in the long run. Besides, I would hate wearing sweats everyday. I love fashion so much and try to keep up with it as much as I can! I’ve lost all my baby weight so it hasn’t been too hard to adjust to ‘mommy style’- except that it takes a while for your hips to go back so pants still don’t fit the same! (grr) But I wear all the things I used to wear and still shop at the same places. I think it’s important to remember who you were before you became a mommy. It’s hard because now my whole world revolves around Cruz, but I’m still the person I was before he was born.
I love Forever 21, Goodwill, Savers and My Sisters Closet (both the store and my sister’s actual closet! Haha)

Now for the fun question!!
If you, Jason and Cruz could take a vacation anywhere in the world and money was no issue, where would go??
Ok well, there’s two places. First, I’d go to New York! It’s been a life long dream of mine to go there and I have not ever made it yet!! I’d spend a week there and then take a plane from there directly to Italy. I’d love to go to Rome, Venice… the entire country would pretty much be perfect.

Jess gets her blog on..you can follow her personal blog here AND you can follow Cruz, her adorable son and his green seat adventures here.

The worst Mom EVER!!

Well I'm sitting here knowing that many of you are waiting for this post..
I keep forgetting you all actually read my tweets, blog posts and facebook updates..
I just kinda forget that part sometimes.
And because this day has been what it has (I'm leaving lots out for you with weak stomachs) this cannot be eloquent, wordy, witty and full of wisdom..it is what it is.

Today I forgot about Silas (#4)..in fact I forgot about him so much the school had to call me...

"Hello this is Amber." my really professional phone answering skills come through when I know it's the school.

"Yes, this is Debbie from Dutch Hill Elementary."
**Long pause**
"Um Yes?" My response...as in why in the world are you calling me Debbie receptionist lady...as in it is still not EVEN clicking that I've committed the worst of all parenting crimes.

"Yes, were you planning on picking up Silas today from school?"

I then shrieked very loudly (like someone has died loud) and say,

"I'm the worst Mom EVER!!!" Like really loud..and like really high pitched and annoying.

To which Debbie (thankfully) started cracking up really hard.

By the time I arrived at school a whole 50 MINUTES LATE!!!!!
I had cried off all of my makeup and had convinced myself that CPS would be waiting.

Thankfully the office ladies were still laughing at my shriek and worst Mom ever comment...

Silas of course being #4 did not seem too upset by the whole thing..

"Mom, I just wanted to give you my Mother's Day present, and I was wondering where you were."

Why oh why did God think I deserved such a perfect child..not sure I will ever know.

This ranks up there with when I almost had to have Isabelle's toe amputated..but that is for another post..

A million wishes.

When I was in about 5th grade I started Awana.
Do you know what Awana is?
It is basically the Christian equivalent to Girl Scouts. Looking back I'm pretty sure I was the only heathen in the class. I did not have all the nice Christian girl answers (be shocked..yes, your right in saying that I have not changed much). I always answered the opposite of what we were suppose to answer..which in case you did not know the answer to all questions in church are one word answers..Jesus.

So I'm sitting next to perfect Christian girl. The teacher asks me this question...

"If you had one wish, what would it be Amber?"

"Oh!! I know!! I would wish for a million more wishes!! Then I would never use up my wishes!!"

Let's stop for a moment here..I totally thought I was sooo clever. I mean come on.. a million more wishes..how smart am I??

"Ok Amber..what a nice answer, what about you Heather?"
(why are all perfect girls named Heather?)

"Oh I would use my one wish to make sure everybody in the world has Jesus in their heart."

Oh thats just great..

Really she was just super jealous that I was going to use one of my wishes for a party with Tiger Beat magazine and Cory Haim.

Then all the other perfect girls after her answered JUST THE SAME!! I mean not the exact same, but like a Miss America pageant..

"Oh I would wish for an end to world hunger." said Melissa.

"I would wish for a cure for cancer!" said Cindy.

"Um..Jesus??" said Samantha.

So today I'm going to tell you about my 3 wishes, not a million. I feel a little guilty about not wishing for more noble things. I should wish to end world hunger, cure diseases and all that good stuff, but instead I'm going to wish for 3 totally materialistic items..items that would never fulfill me, items that are totally shallow. BUT maybe I COULD feed starving children if I had an I-Phone..well it could happen.

A Mac Book Pro..a photog's dream computer. My next cameraI could respond to emails from all the children I helped save from hunger via this I-Phone..can't you just picture it now??

Mommy Monday

Stacy Strombeck is an Arizona native raised in Scottsdale. She is married to Bob and together they have 2 adorable boys, Lance and Luke. She has a hilarious dry sense of humor and seems to tower above most women I know. I asked Stacy if she would share her story with us on Mommy Monday…

So lady, how is the weather down south?
Just fantastic today. About 80 degrees and partially cloudy. I think this may be our last cool spell before the dreaded summer heat.

Tell me about your boys, Lance and Luke.
Lance is 3 years old, Luke is 11 months.

Around the time I first met you, Lance your eldest started to change, what happened?
Lance developed normally. He was just like any other baby. He smiled and laughed, and walked and talked, all right on schedule. He was a very happy, loving little guy. He could say about five words. At 18 months, Lance lost his words, as well as his skills, like waving bye-bye, pointing, and playing peek-a-boo. Bob said it was like he had a switch, and someone turned it off. He was diagnosed with autism at 21 months of age.

The first time you heard the word Autism, what went through your mind?
Well, Lance had pretty much stopped talking. Everyone said not to worry, that boys talk late. Everyone had some story about a child they knew who didn't talk until he was five, and then turned out to be a genius. I remember Bob and I went to San Francisco for a long weekend in November of 2007. We left Lance home with my mom. I came home, all excited, and said to my Mom, "Well, did he say anything?" My mom said no. A few days later, Katie Couric was doing a story about autism on the nightly news. They listed symptoms, and one was loss of speech. I thought, that's what's happening. Lance has lost his speech. I literally broke out in a cold sweat, and I went and threw up.Then I jumped on the computer and went on line. Did you know that when you Google the word "autism", you get 18,000,000 hits? I read and read and read. I made an appointment with our pediatrician, who referred us to a developmental pediatrician, who said yep, autism. So by the time Lance was actually diagnosed, I already knew.
Katie Couric told me.

This was also just about the time you found out you were pregnant again..wow all I can think of is how overwhelmed you must have felt…
Yes, I was 12 weeks pregnant with Luke, our much-wanted second child, when Lance was diagnosed. The main thing that was horrible was that, once I found out we were having another boy, I knew Luke's risk for autism is hugely increased. The statistics right now are 1 in 150 children has autism, and 1 in 94 boys. Luke's at an additional increased risk because his brother has been diagnosed. The best advice I got was, don't worry about something until it happens. In other words, don't worry about Luke having autism, unless and until he's actually diagnosed. There are so many other ways I can focus my time and energy, like working with Lance. So that's what I've decided to do.


Tell me about your hubby, he seems like a great guy. (I mean he dressed up as ‘The man in the yellow hat’ for Halloween..Zach would NEVER do that!!) How hard was this on him, how did it affect your marriage?Ya, wasn't that great when Bob dressed up with Lance, who was Curious George?Autism has it's own special stress for dads, I think. Autism is expensive. The latest figure I saw said it costs 3.5 million dollars to raise an autistic child to age 18. Of course there is assistance available, but we shoulder a huge amount of the expense ourselves. So I know that Bob feels the stress of providing for our family.The divorce rate of couples with kids with autism is somewhere around 83 percent. Bob and I are determined not to be a part of that statistic. We have chosen to ban together to fight this disorder, not each other. I can tell you I would not be able to do any of this without Bob. He is a rock, and I love him more every day. Our relationship isn't perfect, but we really work at it.

So tell us about your daily letters and how you came up with this idea.Well, I was a fan of Barack Obama when he was running for office. I think that he is the epitome of hope for our nation. When he gave his acceptance speech, and said, "Yes we can!", I thought, "Yes we can. . .help my son Lance." And I thought President Obama would be the one to help me. So I decided to write him a letter, about Lance. And then I decided to write him a letter every day. In each letter, I ask President Obama to meet with me, to discuss Lance and autism. So far, I've received a form letter from his Correspondence Director. That's progress, baby! I will continue to write until I hear from the President himself, or the FBI shows up at my door, whichever comes first.

The part that resonates with me the most about your letters is at the end where you list the statistics of Autism. It was not until I read that the first time that this epidemic really sank in for me. Those are some crazy statistics…Recently, I heard the Vice President of Research for an organization called Autism Speaks. She said something like, 1 in 150 children being diagnosed is unacceptable. If 1 child in 150 were being kidnapped from our schools, the public outcry would be unbelievable. The thing is, that 1 in 150 children are being kidnapped. By autism.

Ok the fun question…So if you had a sitter and a 1000 bucks what would you do for the day??Oh, goodie. A fun question. Okay, this is going to sound like I'm off my rocker, but I would take Bob, both kids, and the sitter, and go to Legoland. We went two weeks ago, and we had the best time ever. I'd take the sitter so Bob and I could go out for a nice dinner after Legoland. I know I sound loonie, but Lance was amazing on that trip. I never would have attempted it a year ago, but he's come so far. The smile on that kid's face went from ear to ear. The look on his face was worth more than any spa day or shopping spree could ever be.

The message that I would like to get out is that autism is treatable. Early intervention works. The families we've met with older ASD kids are living proof of this. And so is Lance. He gets a little bit better every day.

You can read all of Stacy's (Stacy Strombeck-Goodrich) daily letters to President Obama by asking to be her friend via facebook. Just mention you follow this blog.

Happy Birthday Dylan & Shad!!

"Here is heartbeat A and here is heartbeat B."

"Hmm..what?."

"I said, here is heartbeat A and here is heartbeat B."

"Really lady..still not following you."

"Baby A heart..Baby B heart."

"You mean to tell me there are TWO babies in there?"

"Yes."

My two precious baby boys who are not so baby anymore, you forever changed our world, love you more than you could ever imagine.

Gaining Momentum

It all started around 2 years ago.

I put Zach on a plane Easter weekend for AZ, forever changed.

Now I'm back in Washington state, not too far from my sweet old home on Reiner Road, and the adventure continues. Next month I leave for grand Paris, our lease is up the 15th of June and we still have no house, still have no idea where Zach will be working.. really no idea of anything.

It's like the longest limbo you could ever imagine.

I feel like that boy, except I'm just a little over half way down the hill..gaining speed.. I see the end.. it's coming faster than I want it to.

I just can't decide.. will it be a relief to hit the water and slowly float up to the surface?

Or will the sting from the impact stun me so bad I sink to the bottom?