Toxic



(although..by writing this post I'm not remaining too silent, now am I?)

I have this funny little allergy to the weed killer Round-Up.

This first time I noticed it I was in my early 20's, it was at a neighborhood clean-up day. I was acting all neighborly and thinking I was pretty dang awesome when the itching started.

It normally starts on my arms, just a small little itch, really it's not soo bothersome at all. It spreads to my hands, neck then I get a little tickle in the back of my throat and I have to clear my throat..almost like I have a nervous tick or something.

It's not a very severe reaction at all, however I have never used it long enough to test my luck... I can usually spot it pretty quickly when someone is using Round-Up and I get away from it...

LIKE FAR AWAY.

I mean the stuff is poison.. toxic.

If I had been out there spraying essential oils and distilled water I'm pretty dang sure I would not have gotten the itchies.

Sometimes I think we meet people like this...

(spray people? itchy people? essential oil people? Where are you going with this Amber?!!??)

(stay with me)

You might be going along your day.. being all neighborly, driving your mini-van, drinking too much sbux and suddenly you notice you're itchy.

Ok, maybe you don't itch.. maybe its that funny feeling in your gut.. you might get a rather odd phone call.. or a message via facebook that just does not seem to sit right....

Then it builds and next thing you know you are scratching at your neck, clearing your throat and find yourself in the middle of a rather toxic relationship with a rather toxic person (or persons).. poisoning everything they touch.

There is a reason they keep the Round-Up in a special section at Lowes.. you know AWAY from all the LIVING plants.

Because... poison can't really co-mingle with something that is alive.. flourishing.. those two don't match.. can't match.. impossible.

I guess dear reader as I get older I need to start trusting that itch a tad sooner. You might call it your gut instinct, I say it's my Creator quietly (because He is a gentleman and all) tapping..

"Tap, tap Amber.. this is bad.. move away.." the voice quietly says.

"Naw!! Really it's ok..I can rise above it..it won't effect me.. I'm so much stronger than that!!"
(yes, my narcissism even plays into my conversations with Christ)

So what do you do when you look around and suddenly find yourself in the middle of the toxic isle at Lowe's?

Why you drop that poison, turn around and get the heck out of there.. fast.

We all have seen how fast it works..how quickly it spreads.. from one person to another and before you even know it, entire lives are destroyed.. it's a rather nasty bit of business.

So here I am.. tapping it out via my mac, late, so deeply irritated with myself, my lack of faith, my all too humanness getting the best of me once again.. oh fortheloveofpete when will I get it right and just listen.

Because I'm reminded (again) that I'm not responsible for another persons poison.. just my own.

"In the final analysis, it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway."

Dr. Kent M. Keith

Comments

Unknown said…
deep breath.

much love.
deb
Auntna said…
Wow......deep XO :)

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