A nice healthy dose of perspective

I don't want this post to be the preverbal..

"We are so blessed to live here" lecture. (I hope you know we are)

or even the

"1.4 million children die of water born illnesses a year" post either. (the water looked like chocolate milk)

or

"all I'm asking is for 1 dollar per brick and we can build a school" (if you do want to help out..let me know)

Really peeps I don't know what to say without it coming off as self-righteous and over played.

I will say this, post Kenya I feel like things {mean people,money, politics, general end of the world feeling, my art} that really seemed to matter when my plane lifted off 17 days ago don't seem to matter as much right now.

I don't know how to process what I'm walking through, I don't know how to feel about what I've seen. I'm not tough, brave or fearless. Today I feel sad, humbled and very quiet..my soul is craving silence.

Silly, silly Amber is what I'm saying to myself as I look in the mirror.

I feel a bit like a fool.

My Creator gave me perspective. Sadly it always has to be earth shaking for me..I guess I don't pick up well on the small cue's (homelessness, joblessness, earthquakes). I have to feel it, it has to be personal. I don't like that about myself..I wish I was the fast learner type.

For my perspective shift today I marveled at my faucet. I turned it on and clean clear water came pouring out.

Really peeps its a little bit of genius.

**I'm working on my Kenya story. I will be posting the stories {and pic's} all next week**

Kenya

My heart is all a flutter.

One part of me is beyond belief..the other part is scared out of my mind.

To say that I've been neurotic these past few days..umm understatement.

(oh and a quick little thanks to all my besties and family that have been putting up with above mentioned neurotic-ness)

I'm packed, schedules are written, kiddos are set, house is clean, family and friends are waiting on speed dial for Zach's call. After months of prep, it's go time.

For the next 12 days I will not have access to running water, power, an actual flushing toilet, my iphone or mac. I will experience life how most of the world experiences life..very raw.

I. So. Can't. Wait.

I fully expect to come back changed.

Zach thinks I'm going to stop shaving my legs and picket the opera.

I covet your thoughts and prayers for myself and mi familia as well.

Frankly, I think I'm going to need all the help I can get:)

Amber

The List...and happy soggy Sunday to you all!

If I close my eyes and click my heals 3 times can this be home?? Seriously..after a LONG weekend full of rain..I'm so, so, sooooo ready for some outdoor entertaining and warm breezes. Summer, please hurry. (via)

10. Why is it that 7-8-9 year old boys ALWAYS tear holes in the knees of their jeans?? Remember Tough Skin jeans by Sears?? That was a little bit of a "jeanius" idea. (hahaha I crack myself UP!)

9. Last night I heard the frogs...that means spring is coming!

8. Food prices..SHEEESH. Killing me. Two words.. MEAL PLAN.

7. Interesting article from the NYT talking about the days of blogging being on the decline. I totally agree. 4 Amberisms on the subject.

-TMI No I'm not talking about the blog that is abundant in personal info, but rather there are now so many blogs, with so many different subjects that it all gets a little overwhelming.

-Why sit and read a 10 minute post when you can be a friend on facebook and find everything out in one status update.

-Twitter (like facebook) is like an ongoing blog.. Heck, you can track peoples bathroom habits via twitter.

-Time..we are so busy staying connected via social sites we don't have time to read about why Amber loves Justin Beiber now. (umm soo your loss)(I jest..I jest)(ok only a little)(narcissism)

(Bonus Amberism--this is one of the reasons that it is more important than ever to be authentic in your blog)

6. MUST SEE THIS MOVIE!!! Can. Not. Wait.

5. I have not slept in days, I'm pretty sure this is going to be a running pattern until I leave.

4. Freshman orientation with Twins A & B... Too much to handle. Stop growing NOW.

3. Is it not so weird to watch a natural disaster live on TV?.

2. My entire being is unsettled.

1. 5 Days...OMGOSH.

And I'm going to leave you with a little bonus this week..don't say I never do anything for you:)

Just because..

we could all use a little bit more of this...



Without art, the crudeness of reality would make the world unbearable.
George Bernard Shaw

Coming soon to a theater near you.

My car was broken into on Saturday afternoon..sigh.

I would be totally lying to you if I said I did not wake up in a bad mood on Sunday. Really I should not say bad mood, more like feeling a little down, maybe just a touch overwhelmed.

I made the mistake of looking over our insurance stuff and (i think) realizing that none of the my equipment that was stolen is going to be covered. Along with a pretty high deductible for the window, hours spent vacuuming safety glass out of my van and waking up with about a gazillion little superficial cuts all over my hands from trying to get the above mentioned safety glass out of the van.

So I started to clean..Zach and I were both anxious, he said he felt like "Everything is unraveling, fast." Me too. Being two people of the mind-set..always stay calm..ALWAYS, its a little surprising for us to both be rattled.

I clean when feel out of control, really it does not put anything back into control it just makes me feel like I'm doing SOMETHING..especially when what I'm really anxious about is totally one hundred percent out of my hands.

I was in my office..STACKS of papers everywhere..just a mess. I came across this picture.

This is my daughters class at school (only my daughter is showing..I did not have permission to post all the other kiddos).

Her class raised almost 7 THOUSAND Kenyan shillings for the school in Kitui. They are so excited. So proud of themselves..and they should be.

In fact, all that money (in American) was sitting on the floor of my car, in a CLEAR plastic Ziploc bag (super safe..right??).

The thief missed it. It was still there..under all that safety glass.

Suddenly things did not seem so out of control. No, in fact it seemed like everything was going to be just fine. If God has taken care of me up to this point, why would he stop now?

Some days my life feels like a movie.. (with Angelina Jolie playing Amber, the super sexy Mom of twins)

The best part about my movie is that it's not even over yet.

No, it's just getting started.

I'm hoping this is the low point (you know when all seems a loss)

(ok..that might sound a wee bit over dramatic..it's late..I'm tired)

The best part about the Amber movie??

My happy ending is going to be EPIC.