(One of) My Muse.
What fuels you?
What makes you want to create?
Where is your muse?
I had a bit of a unexpected derailing this week. It's funny how life sends you these curve balls, especially when your feeling up in the count (which was my first mistake).. you think maybe you have out-smarted your pitcher.. you know what they are going to throw at you next.. right?
So my dear friend said, "Amber why do you write? Why are you doing Mommy Monday?"
I'm not even sure what I sputtered out at that moment, but I have thought hard about that question the past few days..
I love to tell a good story. I love being a Mother. I admire other Mothers. There is nothing quite like us Mothers, my heart is pulled in many directions, but the direction towards my children pulls strongest.
In my story telling I want, no I DESIRE, CRAVE, NEED to invoke emotion. I want you to feel empathy, I want you to feel compassion, love, respect, awe...
I want us to walk a bit in each others shoes.. not to glorify pain, suffering or hardship.. but rather to strengthen our resolve, give a glimpse into others battles. When we started on this journey we thought it would be perfectly clean homes, orgasmic marriages and smiling wee babes..
When it doesn't turn out that way.. when our white picket fence starts to chip paint we fight feelings of failure.
Marriages fail, addiction wins, relationships strain, children make decisions that just might KILL us, we get sick, jobs are lost, death comes unexpectedly..
These moments do not equal weakness.
That is the biggest lie you have ever been told.
It is in that moment.. that is the moment where life is honestly, dirty, gritty, raw, ugly cry and all.. it is where life is lived.. it is where our true character is defined.
It is where we are made.
Our greatest strengths comes from our greatest pain.
It is in that moment you have a story to tell.
That is the story I want to tell.
Mommy Monday to resume next week.