Friday, April 29, 2011

Nice Matters

Last Saturday I went to the grocery, it was the day before Easter and the store was super busy. I did good and was in and out pretty dang quick. As I was loading my groceries in the back of my smoking hot mini-van, the lady who was parked next to me pulled out and stopped behind my car, rolled down her window and proceeded to say...

"Thanks a @#$@! (word that rhymes with chuckin) lot for parking so close to my &&*@&% (there is that word again) car!! I could not get my door open!!."

Me..VERY stunned. Turns and looks at my car..because let me tell you reader I have been known to commit MANY a parking transgression so I checked..this is what I saw.



I was parked perfectly fine.

****You know those scenes in the movies when something rushes through a persons head and it seems like it takes a long time but really its only taking a split second?? Thats what happens next****

What rushes through my head at the moment I realize that no indeed it was not me who had made the parking error???

I see myself in my Nacho Libre mask and a folding chair raised above my head charging towards her car, a little like this.

(the boys have been playing a lot of WWF on the Xbox)

Or maybe pulling open the car door and asking her who taught her to say such mean things to strangers..or maybe even responding back with a equally tart response..because you KNOW I have it in me.

I had a split second to make the decision..I turned back around...

"I'm sorry." comes tumbling out of my mouth. (I was just as surprised as you)

She pauses..looks confused..yells at me again.

"I'm sorry." This time I say it with a bit more authority and shrug a little.

She guns the car and drives off. I turn to the guy who is loading groceries next to me, we both shrug our shoulders and continue on..

At some point in our culture, nice has stopped mattering. Being nice and respecting others has taken a back seat to making sure our feelings are known...but at the cost of what?

The big question is how do we be nice to the people we DONT want to be nice to?? We all have those peeps in our lives..you know the ones..the bur under the saddle? The lady from the _________, the fellow Mom from school, your child's little league umpire or worse yet the fellow (not nice) photographer that is either one step behind or one even step ahead (gasp!) of you all the time.

Those are the ones you have to dig down really deep to find the nice. It's hard, the whole folding chair over my head move would feel soooo much better..well for a second anyways.

When I break it down, I mean, where the rubber meets the road is in my decision..my response..I can't control angry lady, I only can control myself..gosh thats a lot of pressure and freedom all wrapped up into the bigger issue of personal responsiblity. (deep stuff)

Mostly I need to ask myself.. How do I want to be treated?? This idea comes in many different forms, but still carries the same meaning..

Do unto others..
Karma..
Treat others as you wish to be treated...

I know it's naive of me to think it, but I would like to think that us all being just a little bit nicer sure would make the world a better place.

Treat everyone with politeness, even those who are rude to you - not because they are nice, but because you are.
~Author Unknown

7 comments:

Valerie said...

Love the post and the quote at the end. You are so right!

tinkerverve said...

well said!

Beth E-R said...

I'm sorry you had to suffer the rudeness of that stranger. You really took the high road with your response.

Random Thoughts said...

What a man craves most in another is his kindness. Even when undeserved;even when it is the most difficult thing you can do. It is one of our greatest witnesses. It sets us apart; makes us closer to who we were made in the image of. Nice post.

marvelousmiscellany said...

A) Your chair wielding scenario reminds me of a similar scene in Spy Kids where the dad meets the bully dad, 2) I am in awe of your superior schematic skills within the blog so we can really visualize the situation, and D) I LOVE that we can choose the right thing even when those around us don't. You made her think, my friend. Thanks for the post.

Will Fifield said...

Great post. Who hasn't been blasted by angry lady at some point. Bet it felt GREAT to respond like an intelligent human being instead of monkey see, monkey do. Nice.

Angelia Jenkins said...

Good story Amber. You are a good writer. I enjoyed reading it. It's funny, we get told the golden rule as children over and over. You think we would remember the concept as adults.