My Voice

Tuesday the kiddos were off of school, after a fun morning at the Phoenix Zoo we were heading back, trying to avoid rush hour. As I was merging onto the freeway I was suddenly struck by the shear number of people that were on the freeway during the middle of the day. Traffic was not stopped but all 8 lanes were completely packed, I could see for miles either way, there were for sure hundreds if not thousands of cars surrounding me..
I had one of those moments..you know what I'm talking about right??
That smallish feeling, insignificant, which is always followed by this overwhelming feeling of selfishness, like I really matter or something. For that few minutes with the HSM 3 soundtrack blaring and children bickering in my hot momma mini-van I saw a little glimpse of humanity.
Then me being ..well me, start in with all the really big questions..
Why am I here, what is my purpose, how can one women/mom/wife/lover possibly make a difference in this world, I mean the world is a really really big place, just Phoenix alone is stinking huge!
Then I thought about you all, about blogging, about being narcissistic and why I sit and write this stuff and furthermore why the heck do you read it!!
Truthfully if you are women/man enough to admit it, we all are prideful, just a touch full of ourselves (some more than others, yes?).
I almost think it has to be a coping mechanism to actually bring a little validity to our lives. Its hard to think of little me in the grand scheme of things. Is it not for you? When I pray, why would God listen to me when he also is listening to...oh a martyr in Darfur? How does that make me feel?
Smallish..
So I have this blog.. and it gives me a voice, yes it might be a small voice, yes I might have bad grammar and incorrect spelling and yes I have on occasion made people mad. I believe this is one of the reasons people blog, to bring a little bit of largeness to their lives. To give an average momma of 4 (well..almost average) a voice, a place to be heard, whereas otherwise she might not.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Wow... put that in your pipe and smoke it CJ! Quite profound Miss Aimber :)
tinkerverve said…
Ya! you go girl! (that's a lot of heavy thinking) Are you going to send me your address????
Wendy Girl said…
Ya. I am with Tink. Wheres the new digs. Send it out lady....

Oh, and I dont think it matters where you live. Sometimes just getting out on little ol Hwy 2 does that to me. Its more like what the %$#@, what am I doing here, but anyway.

I love having such an intillectual friend.

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